Wednesday, November 18, 2009

A Message From The Heart

Tammy
On October 20th at approximately 1:00pm I got the news we all had been hoping and praying for. My doctor's office called with the results from my PET and CAT scans...they were normal. Actually she used a lot of medical jargon and I kept asking is that good news. I finally asked "So what you are saying is there is no cancer detected in my body?" and she said that is correct. I let out a big Woo Hoo and just kept thanking her.

I immediately called Mark and through my crying and tears told him the good news. I then called my mom and she just kept thanking God. Then I called my dad, and I can only think of a couple of times I've seen my dad choked up or cry, and he started to get choked up and I could tell he was fighting back tears and I of course was crying. We were just both so happy to hear the good news. Then I called Mark's family and some of my friends I was just so happy and couldn't wait to spread the glorious news. I can't tell you the feeling that came over me when I heard that I was cancer-free. A huge weight was lifted from me and I felt reborn.

This has been a very long road with several bumps and potholes along the way, however there is no way I could have gotten through it without the help of many people. First the doctors and staff at St. Lukes on the Plaza are the most compassionate, caring, intelligent, and thoughtful around. A special thank you to my oncologist Dr. Jeri Hart, I was blessed to have her as my doctor because we just clicked, her bedside manner and her way of explaining things was awesome, plus she helped me keep a positive attitude.

My wonderful husband, Mark, was always by my side and was my rock. He never lost faith, even at times when I was weak physically and in spirit, he wouldn't let me linger there for long. He always reminded me that we were in this together and we would beat it. Plus, he kept me laughing, I can't tell you how many times we laughed, many times at my expense. But that was OK because when you are faced with something like this you can either face it head on and fight it or succumb to it. Well I decided early on that I was going to fight, I have way too much to live for (plus if you knew me in high school and college you know I'm a fighter).

I must say I have two of the best kids anywhere. Even though they were scared and at times did not fully understand what was going on with mommy. They were patient and so loving. They made me so many get-well cards and pictures. But the best was the snuggle time we would have, either at home or in the hospital. They handled this illness so well and I am so proud of them. Our children were precious to me before but are even more so now. I love getting my hugs and kisses from them, with Kaitlynn its easy, with Andrew he will let me as long as his friends aren't around (you know 10 year olds).

My family has been there for me every step of the way. My parents had to go through what no parent wants to, and had to do it from miles away. I know that was hard on them, not being here with me. But the times we were together I treasured so much, and when they were here they did whatever I needed, whether it was going to the hospital with me to keep me company during a blood transfusion or making my favorite pasta salad. Thanks Mom and Dad I love you so much! And Mark's family has been wonderful.

Maria moved in for close to five months while I was in the hospital and recovering at home, so she could help take care of the kids. She got them ready for school, helped with homework, did laundry, grocery shopping and much, much more. And I know that is no small feat with my two kids. But most of all she was a constant, loving presence for the children when Mark and I couldn't be here and that means the world to Mark and I.

Many of you know that Julie kept up the blog and she did an awesome job with that. Many times she was posting at 1 or 2 in the morning and then would have to get up early to keep up with her 2 year old. Julie, you are so creative with your writing you know how to say things in just the right way to convey the meaning whether it be humorous or insightful. Thanks for helping out with the kids; you watched them so much that I know Patrick thinks Kaitlynn is his sister. Thanks so much for all that you've done.

A big thanks to Jamie, or Nurse Jamie as we lovingly call her at times. She was always willing to help out with whatever I needed, watching the kids, visiting me, bringing me dinner from Cheesecake Factory (that was a good one) and especially her medical help. She knew the right questions to ask when we didn't and helped with the insurance and billing paperwork, which is a huge task.

I have to say a special thank you to my sister, Kim. She came out to visit me, even when she should have been resting herself after foot surgery. Plus, she developed some medical problems this year as well but would always be worried about me. I love you sis and here's to both of us being healthy in 2010!! Plus I don't think mom and dad could handle another year with both of us in the hospital.

Then there are all my wonderful neighbors and friends! I can't tell you how much it means to me that you sent cards, fixed meals, visited, called, blogged, emailed, donated and most of all prayed for me and my family. It is truly overwhelming when I think about all the people that have helped me. To the community of Sterling, thank you for supporting not only me but also my parents. I was blown away with the outpouring of support and prayers and donations from my hometown. There is no better place than Sterling to call home!

A huge Thank You to my friends and neighbors here in KC. Mark and I could not ask for better neighbors, when I came home the first time and saw the green ribbons on everyone's home and the "Welcome Home" sign out front and the angels the neighborhood kids colored hanging from my entryway, needless to say I was overcome with emotion. You all are not just neighbors but we consider you family, thank you for all that you have done for us. Hopefully we can repay you in Mexican food!!!!

To all the people that I've heard from across the country, and my friends from high school and college: Thank You and God Bless You! It was so fun to hear from you, believe me you helped boost my spirits. Some were people I didn’t even know but heard of my illness from their friends, prayer groups, or the blog.

Even though I got word that I was cancer free I still have a few hurdles to get over. Next week I will go in for my bone marrow biopsy. The doctor is confident it will come back negative for cancer as well. Once my counts are normal again, the doctor will remove the power port that is underneath my skin. My energy and stamina will slowly come back as well. I can tell a difference in my energy from two weeks ago, but I still get tired and weak easily (it took me a whole week to clean the house instead of one day). I've heard it could take up to a year for me to return to 'normal', whatever that is. But that's OK, I just feel blessed to have my health and the love of my family and friends.

This has been a journey I will never forget, but one that I have learned so much from and have become a stronger person. My relationships with my husband, family, and friends have become stronger as well. You know it's weird to think of but in a way having cancer brought many positive things to my life. Life...boy that word has a whole new meaning to me now.

So again, THANK YOU, for your support and prayers. You have touched my life in such a wonderful way and I truly appreciate your thoughtfulness and generosity.

Please still keep in touch if you want my home email is
t-mllamas@sbcglobal.net. I hope to personally thank as many people as I can, but if I don't please know how much your support means to me. God Bless You!

Love,
Tammy

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Why Chemo Sucks!

As I sit and wait for my final round to start, which it seems to be taking forever, I've thought a lot about what I've been through since January and what the Chemo treatments have been like. I have become so used to the routine when I go in for treatment that I know how each drug affects me and what I will be feeling like during treatment. For example, I know that I usually feel OK until day 3 of Chemo and then the blahs start to set in, the taste buds go, then the stomach problems start, the headaches and so on. So I decided to start a Top 10 List on...

Why Chemo Sucks!
  1. Being attached to an IV pole for 4 or 5 days and carting it everywhere I go.
  2. The beeping of the IV system when the chemo or saline runs out or if the line is twisted and it always seems to happen when I want to sleep.
  3. Interruptions by the staff when I want to sleep or at 4:00 in the morning when they need to draw blood, weigh me, etc. (I know it's there job, but I just want to sleep)
  4. Chemo Brain - I forget the easiest things or it will take me a minute to find the right word when talking, or sometimes I use the wrong word - like telling the dog to quit jumping on me and I said "Pass" instead of "Down" (Mark won't let me live that one down). Of course some people say I had this problem before cancer.
  5. Chemo Gas - you don't want to know!!!!
  6. The very limited channel selections on the hospital TV, I think I've seen Rambo 6 times on my different stays in the hospital. So a lot of court shows, Friends and Everybody Loves Raymond gets watched.
  7. The hospital food, seriously I don't know how they come up with some of the menu items, just the smell of it makes me nauseous at times.
  8. Feeling run down - like you have the flu for 10 days. Just walking up the stairs will wear me out.
  9. Losing my hair - although it's not as bad as I thought it would be, plus I got some cool scarves.
  10. Missing my family, it's hard to be away from them, just being able to peek in on the kids when they are sleeping is something that I take such joy in now. Plus all the hugs and love I get from them when I'm home. Mark comes to visit me every night but when he leaves I get lonely and have to look forward to the next time I see him.
Even though I have been through a lot this year and my body feels run down I also think I'm the happiest I've ever been in my life. Mark and I have a stronger relationship than ever, my kids and I have never been closer and I take so much joy in them and everything they do. I have a stronger relationship with God, actually the whole family does, it is amazing how just having a conversation with God makes me feel better. I cherish my family and friends now more than ever, they have done so much for me and my family, from the donations, food, gifts, prayers, and words of encouragement, there is no way I will be able to repay everyone - so please know how much it is appreciated. Also, I feel like I'm more patient with things, you kind of have to be when you're a cancer patient because nothing moves at the pace you want it to. My hope at the end of this journey is to come out as a better person and be able to give to others like what I have received. I hope to volunteer at the Cancer Institute and help cancer patients in any way I can even if it's just visiting them to say Hello!

Thanks to everyone who has been there for me and my family. We are forever indebted to you and so grateful to have such wonderful family and friends.

Love,
Tammy

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Pizza Night Fundraiser - Thursday, Sept. 10

Pizza Night for Tammy -Thursday, Sept. 10
Don't forget the fundraiser for pizza night in Winfield, Kansas and Sterling, Kansas. The money raised goes towards Tammy’s medical bills.

Gambino’s Pizza has graciously offered to give a certain percentage of sales (with a flyer). Please mention that you are ordering as part of the fundraising event for Tammy Llamas. The date for Winfield, Kansas and Sterling, Kansas Pizza night is Thursday, Sept 10, 2009.

We would appreciate your help in spreading the word, so that the community of Winfield, Kansas and Sterling, Kansas can help in this fundraising event. If you know of anyone living in Winfield or Sterling, please call or email them the information. Every order will help reduce the medical bills for Tammy.

Download a copy of the pizza flyer for Winfield: http://www.scribd.com/doc/19585085/Pizza-Night-Winfield

Download a copy of the pizza flyer for Sterling:
http://www.scribd.com/doc/19585456/Pizza-Night-Sterling

With Love and Gratitude,
Julie Rickman

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Benefit Dinner

Mark is working hard at coordinating a Benefit Dinner to help with medical costs. If you are interested in helping with this event, please send an email to UpdatesOnTammy We are trying to get a location and date. More details to come...

Sunday, August 9, 2009

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Round Four Photos



Mass Schedule In Honor of Tammy Llamas
Prince of Peace Catholic Church
16000 West 143rd Street
Olathe, KS 66062
http://www.princeofpeace.info/
(913) 782-8864

May 16th Saturday 5:00 PM by Family & Friends
June 14th Sunday 12:00 PM by Llamas Family
July 18th Saturday 5:00 PM by Llamas Family

Monday, May 4, 2009

M-E-O-W


I love you Aunt Tammy! ~Love Patrick Andrew

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Happy Easter Everyone

Kaitlynn and Andrew celebrate Easter with their mother.

Easter Celebration at St. Luke's Hospital


Family Time at the hospital

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Here Comes Peter Cotton Tail

Patrick Andrew and Kaitlynn collect Easter eggs

Kaitlynn hugs the Easter Bunny

Slideshow of pictures

Thursday, April 2, 2009

Lights! Camera! Action!

Click on photo gallery to view more pictures.

Weeeee......Weeee.....Weee



Rock Chalk Jayhawk: Neighbor Eric watches the KU game with Tammy

Sisterly Love: Judy and Aunt Gwen



Friendship: Mark and John Golway have been friends since grade school.

Friday, March 27, 2009

CaringBridge Will Be Down On March 28

Just a reminder that the CaringBridge Website will be down on Saturday. Here is the message below that was on the Website:

CaringBridge will be unavailable Saturday, from March 28 from 6:00 AM - 3:00 PM (CDT)
while we make several significant enhancements. Thank you for your patience.


I can't wait to see the "enhancements" to their site.

Julie Rickman

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Chillaxin At Home

Click to view more Pictures of Aunt Kim Visit


Click to view more pictures of

Lorenzo's surprises Tammy with a visit


What is "Tammy Girl" wearing?

(Sorry, Dale, I couldn't resist!)

Click to view more pictures of Family from Texas visits Tammy

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Happy St. Patrick's Day

Julie and Greg Rickman took the kids to the 2009 St. Patrick's Day parade in Kansas City, Missouri. Everyone is a little Irish on March 17.

Pictures have been updated on the photo gallery


Thursday, March 5, 2009

What's Up Doc?

Tammy smiling with Dr. Hart



We Are Family Pictures

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Monday, March 2, 2009

Showing Off Lime Green

Tammy returned to St. Luke's Hospital for Round 3 Chemo treatment on Tuesday, March 3, 2009.

Pictures have been posted to the photo gallery:
Wearing Lime Green Toe Polish for Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma

Tammy and Mark on a date at the Cheesecake Factory

I Fight Like a Girl! Go Tammy, Go Tammy!

Aunt Nito reads a special prayer around family the night before Tammy goes to the hospital for Round 3 Chemo Treatment.

Prayer for the Sick
Dear Jesus, Divine Physician and Healer of the sick, we turn to you in this time of illness. O dearest comforter of the troubled, alleviated our worry and sorrow with your gentle love, and grant us the grace and strength to accept this burden. Dear God, we place our worries in your hands. We place our sick under your care and humbly ask that you restore your servant to health again. Above all, grant us the grace to acknowledge your will and know that whatever you do, you do for the love of us. Amen.

Prayer for a Sick Person
This is a lovely prayer that an individual or family can pray for sick persons.
Almighty and Eternal God, the everlasting health of those who believe; hear us for Thy sick servant Tammy Llamas for whom we implore the aid of Thy tender mercy, that being restored to bodily health , she may give thanks to Thee in Thy Church. Through Christ our Lord. Amen.

Prayer Source: The Catholic Family Handbook by Rev. George A. Kelly, Random House, Inc., New York, 1959

Upcoming Mass Schedule In Honor Of Tammy

Friday, March 6, 2009 at 8:15 a.m.
Prince of Peace Catholic Church
16000 West 143rd Street
Olathe, KS 66062
http://www.princeofpeace.info/
(913) 782-8864
By: All Her Family & Friends




Sunday, March 29, 2009 at 9 a.m.
Prince of Peace Catholic Church
16000 West 143rd Street Olathe, KS 66062
(913) 782-8864
By: The Llamas Family



Sunday, April 26, 2009 at 9 a.m.
Prince of Peace Catholic Church
16000 West 143rd Street Olathe, KS 66062
(913) 782-8864
By: Jamie McLeod

Thursday, February 26, 2009

Preparing Meals For The Family

Mark and Tammy are very appreciative of all the meals that have been prepared for the family. It helps alleviate some stress when dinner is brought to the house. The family enjoyed the food that Dale and Judy brought from Sterling. This weekend, some of Mark's family will be coming to help care for Tammy. Aunt Nito from Colorado and Aunt Joanne and Uncle Mario from Winfield will be cooking next week for the family. They will be leaving on March 6th, so if anyone would like to prepare a meal and be added to the list, please contact the Meal Coordinator, Julie Bryant by email at juliebryant@alumni.mnu.edu or call her at (913) 393-0106.

Thank you for your generosity.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Picture This

Pictures of Tammy at home

Monday, February 23, 2009

I Need A Vacation

Pictures from Monday, February 23, 2009
Andrew school performance, "I Need A Vacation"

Staycation Weekend

Aunt Jamie and Aunt Julie take Kaitlynn and Andrew to the Marriott for some fun in the pool.



Staycation

Click on the picture to go to picture album.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Isn't She Lovely


Tammy looking beautiful after a long day at the hospital for a chemo treatment.

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Video of Prayer Gathering



View the video of the prayer gathering that was held in Mark and Tammy's home on Monday, February 9, 2009.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

My Journey Through Cancer

Tammy created a Mandala and called it "My Journey Through Cancer".

Mandalas guide us in meditation. Mandalas help us achieve an inner calm and focus on what is essential, skills that we often lose in times of crisis.

Practice following set patterns or draw your own to create order within yourself as you accept the orderliness of the mandala, and gain perspective on what really matters in life.

Whatever hues you choose are fine, and the end result will always be perfect. When you are coloring you are embarking on a personal path, experiencing things differently than anyone else.


To find out more information on a Mandala go to: http://www.mandalaproject.org/What/Index.html

To see more pictures of Tammy go to: http://picasaweb.google.com/updatesontammy/Round2StLukeS#



Video of Tammy explaining her Mandala
My Journey Through Cancer

(A special thank you to my husband, Greg Rickman for working his magic and helping me convert the file type of the video so that it was viewable to everyone.)

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

A Special Essay About A Mother

Andrew wrote an essay about his mother for a school assignment. At his parent/teacher's conference, Andrew read his essay to his parents. Mark and Tammy are so proud of him. After the prayer gathering, Mark asked Andrew if he would read the essay to his family. Click on the picture of Andrew below to listen to him read his essay.


My Guiding Principle Essay by Andrew Llamas (3rd grade)

Do you have a person who fights for you to have a better life? Well I do! It's my mom! My mom is responsible for everything like cleaning, cooking, and washing and a whole lot of other things. My mom was in the hospital a few weeks ago. She was very sick. She had bruises in her gall bladder and then a few weeks later, she got lymphoma or cancer if you prefer. She had to take chemotherapy or medicine. She fights as hard as she can and we are so proud of her. She is always honest every millisecond of the day. My mom trusts my grandma to take care of us! My mom respects everyone even when she's hurt. My mom is so brave. :)

[Editor's note: Aunt Julie is so proud of her nephew. She loves her "Sugar Boy".]




Some people wanted to know where the family bought the Lymphoma Awareness t-shirts that were worn at the prayer gathering. We purchased them online at http://www.cafepress.com/. Search for Lymphoma, Lymphoma Awareness, or cancer to bring up different products.

Monday, February 9, 2009

The Day Before Round Two

Here are a few photos from this weekend. Click here to see more pictures

Mark and Tammy enjoy their weekend together



Holly Menning, Tammy Llamas, Julie Bryant

Tammy is wearing a prayer shawl. This shawl was made especially for you as a reminder that a group of women are praying for you. We believe that God can and does reach out to each one of us in tangible ways. When you put this shawl around your shoulders, we prayer you will feel God's loving arms holding you and his unconditional love and healing ministering to you.

A special thank you to the Prayer Shawl Ministry from the College Church of the Nazarene


Lymphoma Warrior


Prayer Gathering - Thanks for all the support and prayers tonight. The evening was so special.

Friday, February 6, 2009

Home Sweet Home

Tammy enjoys the comforts of home.

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Welcome Home Tammy

Tammy on the day of her homecoming


Video of Andrew and Kaitlynn seeing their mommy.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

St. Peregrine - Patron Saint Of Cancer Patients

Why is Saint Peregrine the patron saint of cancer patients?
For a special penance, Peregrine decided to stand whenever it was not necessary to sit down. He did not sit down for more than thirty years. He developed varicose veins and then cancer of the foot. The sores were painful and doctors were not able to do anything to make it better. The only thing to do was to amputate his leg. He spent the night before the operation in prayer, and then had a vision of Christ touching his impaired limb. The next morning he was cured of cancer. Peregrine is the patron of cancer patients.


Prayer to Saint Peregrine
O great St. Peregrine, you have been called "The Mighty," "The Wonder-Worker," because of the numerous miracles which you have obtained from God for those who have had recourse to you.

For so many years you bore in your own flesh this cancerous disease that destroys the very fibre of our being, and who had recourse to the source of all grace when the power of man could do no more. You were favoured with the vision of Jesus coming down from His Cross to heal your affliction. Ask of God and Our Lady, the cure of the sick whom we entrust to you.

(Pause here and silently recall the names of the sick for whom you are praying)
Tammy Lynn Llamas

Aided in this way by your powerful intercession, we shall sing to God, now and for all eternity, a song of gratitude for His great goodness and mercy.

Amen


A special thank you to Julie and Cindy for mentioning Saint Peregrine.

Sunday, February 1, 2009

A New Look and A New Outlook

Do You Need Your Carpets Cleaned?

Mark Frederick
Professional Carpet Cleaner
(913) 207-4017


Mark and Tammy would like to thank Mark and Amy Frederick. Mark Frederick, (a professional carpet cleaner), cleaned all the carpets in the house in preparation for Tammy's homecoming. He is from Tammy’s hometown of Sterling and Tammy use to babysit him, but now he lives in the Kansas City area. Once he found out about Tammy, he offered to clean carpets. He did a fabulous job! If you need your carpets cleaned, please give him a call.

Mass Schedule In Honor Of Tammy

Family and friends are invited to celebrate at a mass in honor of Tammy Llamas.
If you have scheduled a mass in honor of Tammy, please send an email at UpdatesOnTammy@gmail.com and I'll add the date to the list.

Wednesday, Feb. 4, 2009 at 6:15 a.m.
Prince of Peace Catholic Church
16000 West 143rd Street
Olathe, KS 66062
(913) 782-8864
By: All Her Family & Friends

Wednesday, Feb. 4, 2009 at 8 a.m.
Holy Name Catholic Church
412 E 8th Ave
Winfield, KS 67156
(620) 221-3610
By: Mario and Joan Narvaes

Saturday, Feb. 7, 2009 at 5 p.m.
Holy Family Cathedral
810 S Boulder Ave
Tulsa, OK 74119
(918) 582-6247
By: The McConn Family: Patrick, Andi, Tim, and Kristie

Tuesday, Feb. 10, 2009 at 8 a.m.
Church of Corpus Christi
6001 Bob Billings Pkwy
Lawrence, KS 66049
(785) 843-6286
By: The Brown Family - Sean, Pam, Morgan

Friday, March 6, 2009 at 8:15 a.m.
Prince of Peace Catholic Church
16000 West 143rd Street
Olathe, KS 66062
(913) 782-8864
By: All Her Family & Friends


Sunday, March 29, 2009 at 9 a.m.
Prince of Peace Catholic Church
16000 West 143rd Street
Olathe, KS 66062
http://www.princeofpeace.info/
(913) 782-8864
By: All Her Family & Friends


Sunday, April 26, 2009 at 9 a.m.
Prince of Peace Catholic Church
16000 West 143rd Street
Olathe, KS 66062
http://www.princeofpeace.info/
(913) 782-8864
By: All Her Family & Friends

Monday, January 26, 2009

Do You Have A Bracelet?

Family and friends are showing their support for Tammy by wearing a lime green lymphoma wristband. It says, "WE SUPPORT TAMMY!".


To order a bracelet, send an email to UpdatesOnTammy@gmail.com. A minimum donation of $10.00 for each bracelet will be accepted. Available in Adult and Youth sizes. Please indicate how many you are ordering and what size.

Winfield, Kansas area - contact Lorenzo Tapia
Kansas City area -contact Mark, Jamie, or Julie
Sterling, Kansas - contact Dale & Judy Rose


Gracious thanks,
Mark and Tammy Llamas

Saturday, January 24, 2009

Where To Send Donations

Family and friends have asked how they can make donations to the family to help with expenses. Mark set up a "Caring For Tammy" account at the bank.

Donations can be sent to:

Mark or Tammy Llamas
15874 West 158th Street
Olathe, Kansas 66062

Thank you for your generosity!

Monday, January 5, 2009

My Story From The Beginning

As the New Year began, Tammy was experiencing abdominal pain that was becoming uncomfortable. She went to see her doctor on Monday, January 5, 2009. As her stomach began to swell, it was apparent that she would need to have her gall bladder removed. Later that night, the pain increased and her husband, Mark, took her to the emergency room. They admitted her into the hospital and removed her gall bladder on Tuesday. After several tests throughout the week including an ultrasound and biopsy on her lymph nodes, it was discovered that she had lymphoma.
On Friday, January 9th, she was moved to St. Luke's Hospital in Kansas City, Missouri to be closer to her doctor and a hospital that was fully equipped. The pathology report stated the specific type of lymphona is Non-Hodgkins Large B-Cell Burkitt lymphoma. This is a very aggressive type of lymphoma, however it is also curable in many cases--Thank God! Tammy was informed that she would begin chemotherapy the week of January 12, 2009.

And now Tammy's journey begins...